And PS we were at Sandy Springs Quaker Meeting last Sunday for meeting for worship and the following solar panel installation ribbon cutting event, so your mom has been on my mind. Love seeing your picture from back then. And my favorite line in your post is the one re mercy keeping us from too much righteous. Amen. The mercy of the fallen as Dar Williams sings! https://www.darwilliams.com/songs/f/The_Beauty_of_The_Rain/188/
A good reminder, dear Asha. I wish I were better at mercy, both for myself and for others. In a current fucking awful manic episode, I am not a likeable person. Not. At. All. I have to remind myself that I'll get through this, once again. And some will forgive me, and some will not. And perhaps the former are my people and the latter not so much. And I'll hope I can forgive myself. As Dorothy Allison says, a journey not a destination. I like that.
Hm - what a thought provoking post - perhaps your point about mercy being a concept more linked to religion is apt as I am not religious thus don’t think much in terms of “mercy”. That said, what it reminds me of most in my own practice is some combination of acceptance (eg of a reality, a person’s complexity that may be behind my full understanding), letting go (eg sorting out when something is not mine to fix - like someone else’s learning or remorse), and compassion (maybe as a reminder that I too am human and deeply flawed and thus to not judge others too harshly). It reminds me of some Buddhist teachings though I can’t think of a particular single concept that parallels mercy specifically.
You’re reminding me of this marvelous book!
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/547760/hallelujah-anyway-by-anne-lamott/
And PS we were at Sandy Springs Quaker Meeting last Sunday for meeting for worship and the following solar panel installation ribbon cutting event, so your mom has been on my mind. Love seeing your picture from back then. And my favorite line in your post is the one re mercy keeping us from too much righteous. Amen. The mercy of the fallen as Dar Williams sings! https://www.darwilliams.com/songs/f/The_Beauty_of_The_Rain/188/
Anne Lamott is truly one of the patron saints of my writing life. ❤️ I can’t wait to listen to the Dar Williams song!
I feel glad you and June are able to work things out as you keep a connection. Takes courage and Love. You are both such good people. xoxox
A good reminder, dear Asha. I wish I were better at mercy, both for myself and for others. In a current fucking awful manic episode, I am not a likeable person. Not. At. All. I have to remind myself that I'll get through this, once again. And some will forgive me, and some will not. And perhaps the former are my people and the latter not so much. And I'll hope I can forgive myself. As Dorothy Allison says, a journey not a destination. I like that.
Hm - what a thought provoking post - perhaps your point about mercy being a concept more linked to religion is apt as I am not religious thus don’t think much in terms of “mercy”. That said, what it reminds me of most in my own practice is some combination of acceptance (eg of a reality, a person’s complexity that may be behind my full understanding), letting go (eg sorting out when something is not mine to fix - like someone else’s learning or remorse), and compassion (maybe as a reminder that I too am human and deeply flawed and thus to not judge others too harshly). It reminds me of some Buddhist teachings though I can’t think of a particular single concept that parallels mercy specifically.
Thanks for sharing so courageously on here.
Btw. I emailed this to my mother.
How did that go?
Well, I didn’t expect a response. And there has been none. I wanted her to read it, not necessarily engage in conversation. So. All good
This was a hard read for me. I have not had a relationship w my mom for 7 yrs. I have not found a lot of mercy yet.
In my world, forgiveness and mercy aren’t compulsory.
❤️❤️