16 Comments

Well, damn if that mallet didn’t do a good job, because you and this column are delish! One of my faves. :)

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Gosh, I love you. ❤️ Thanks for being my constant companion on this crazy journey. Your integrity and faithfulness fills me right up.

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Love every word of the, Asha:

We need each other to do this work successfully— to keep each other company when it’s hard, to hold each other accountable, and to cheer each other on when we somehow manage to knock it out of the park. Working together we can refuse shame, and provide vulnerable, loving, steadfast witness. No single person, no matter how successful their integrity practice may be, can transform the integrity of an entire community, a nation, or the world. But all of us working together can do that.

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Your faithful witness and cheering saves me every time, E Jean. Thank you! ♥

P.S. I saw this morning that the judge is protecting the jurors in your trial. Thank goodness! There's some integrity for you. Yay, Judge!

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Wow, I really loved this. For so many reasons, but mostly because it feels so good to hear someone else put words to my own budding awareness around these issues. I will be revisiting those last five paragraphs a few more times for thorough digestion. Excellent! And thank you.

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Thank you! I’m so glad to be helpful.

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Hi Asha! I’m new here. Thank you for sharing your origin story. Thank you for writing on this topic. It’s important. I had a similar childhood including a brother with the same name as yours who chose violence and abuse with me. Lots of therapy in these years. I also spent years in nonprofits, trying to make the world a better place, and mostly feeling angry and stuck in meetings. Now I try really hard to live in integrity and a lot of compassion. Anyway, I am looking forward to learning more in this space.

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I’m so glad you’re here! Welcome!

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I read the paragraph about the messy emotional work three times in a row. And I’ve saved the post to come back and read it again.

Thank you, Asha.

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This is so beautiful. We need to give grace to ourselves and others while also encouraging each other to learn to do better and then actually do better. And we need to do it together, because in the end, all we really have is each other.

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For sure! It's a balancing act, but it's easier to do it with help.

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Asha! I found this when you reposted it and it was put out on Notes by someone I subscribe to. Thank goodness as it may be the best thing I have ever read.

Your words on integrity resonate deeply with me, they lift me up. Most importantly they make sense and are raw and real. I love the land of the fairies and unicorns, it is my land🤣, but integrity needs to be solidly grounded. This essay provides that foundation for us to work from. Thank you.

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Oh, Donna! Thank you very much for this reflection.

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I have been struggling this week as to why I’m writing a memoir- going back into the past and bringing light to painful things. This post speaks to my why. I also love this quote by Cole Arthur Riley. “We are worthy of tending to the pain of the past- Repair, truth-telling, healing, reconciliation- these are what breathe new life into us.”

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Amen! I love Cole Arthur Riley. She's an amazing writer and thinker.

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