Let's step away for a moment

From the news cycle, from our emotions-- the list goes on

Photo by Jens Lelie on Unsplash

I tried to watch the U.S. presidential debate last night. I was simultaneously on a Thread sharing blow-by-blow responses with the subscribers to one of my favorite newsletters, Men Yell At Me, which I thought would help me get through it because I’d feel less alone. I did feel less alone, but also more emotionally amped up by everyone else’s emotional reactivity, so I bowed out within half an hour.

I won’t recap the debate itself or make any pronouncements about it. There is plenty of breathless media coverage of it this morning to imbibe if you feel the need. I don’t. It won’t help me make a decision or practice my integrity, just stress me out and derail my day. It does make me feel like we should revisit one of the central aspects of decision making with integrity, though, which is discernment.

If you want a deep dive on discernment, this newsletter is the one for you (I just reread it and it’s very good, if I do say so myself.):

Discernment is not only essential to practicing integrity, but I think essential to navigating this moment in history well. The difference between discernment and simply deciding something is, ultimately, time and reflection. Or, as I wrote in the newsletter above, “deciding is a hell of a lot quicker.” But in a world moving at the breathless, breakneck pace of ours currently, with a news and social media culture that privileges emotionally reactive “hot takes”, sound bites, tribalism, and indignation, I don’t think speedy decision making is often our friend.

Discernment, which requires careful deliberation, personal reflection, and consultation with trusted advisors and whatever transcendence you bow to, slows everything way, way down. It requires stepping away from the clamor of popular interpretations of events and checking facts and history. Sometimes, it requires working through whatever emotions we have about feeling trapped between two bad decisions, or at least feeling we have no good ones.

How did we get here? Why is it always like this? Nothing is the way it should be. Does no one in power see or care how bad this is?

This is a sample of the thoughts and feelings I’m working through this morning.

But I’d urge all of us to remember (I’m urging myself to remember..,) that not making a choice about something inevitable because you don’t like your options is, in the end, making a choice. And whether or not I, personally, will suffer enormously as a result of my opting out of making an intentional choice, other people will.

Inventorying my duties and responsibilities is a necessary aspect of discernment. Sometimes, I’ll admit, it’s the only thing that gets me to really sit with what is and do what needs to be done.

The next five months for those of us that vote in the United States are going to be an emotional and informational whirlwind. I hope we can support each other here in the midst of it. Let us know what you need, and we’ll do our best.

XO,

Asha